


if i were given a choice, i sure as hell wouldn't pick you

by darcynne



Series: juban snippets [2]
Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Handholding, M/M, Swearing, or is it subtle?, subtle confession
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:21:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27324937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darcynne/pseuds/darcynne
Summary: hyodo’s grip on banri is tight, and so is his hold on the strawberry milk carton with his other hand, its contents spilling out of the straw and dripping down to his fist. banri turns to hyodo, “what’s the deal?”hyodo glares at banri, eyes a lot less piercing than usual, the tips of his ears burning. “don’t you dare turn tail after you make me say that.”
Relationships: Hyoudou Juuza/Settsu Banri
Series: juban snippets [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1993207
Comments: 4
Kudos: 86





	if i were given a choice, i sure as hell wouldn't pick you

**Author's Note:**

> dreamt of this in my nap just a few hours ago, had to jot it all down before my forgetful brain does its own thing ;; too sleepy to proofread, nevertheless i hope you enjoy

“i’ll be right back.” banri gets up from itaru’s sofa to stretch his arms, yawning. god, his back hurts so bad. he should’ve reminded himself earlier to fix his posture while gaming. “gonna get some coffee. kinda tired.”

“sure, have fun.” itaru says, eyes glued on his phone. he doesn’t even spare banri a glance. “don’t you have class tomorrow, though? be a responsible student and go to sleep.”

banri shrugs. “i can show up at lunch, no biggie.”

“whatever you say.” itaru replies. he pauses for a bit, extending his arm to the shelf for another can of red bull. banri winces on the sound of an empty can getting knocked to the floor, courtesy of itaru’s carelessness. how the fuck does itaru manage to not give a single shit about his own mess? banri wishes he could give zero fucks to hyodo’s annoying face like how itaru gives zero fucks to his cluttered room, but then that would mean banri would tolerate hyodo’s face and there’s no way he could do that. as for the reason why he can’t do that, well, he prefers to exercise his right to remain silent.

for the first and last time that night, itaru looks at banri, giving him a wry smile. he finally looks away from his screen. “thanks for today. i can manage on my own now.”

“no prob.” banri opens the door to leave and waves him goodbye. itaru says nothing, motioning his hand to shoo him away. banri finally leaves itaru’s room, chuckling from itaru’s reaction. he locked the door like how itaru instructed him to do every time he retires for the night.

on his way to the kitchen, banri swears to god he is hearing random voices or some shit in the lounge. he doesn’t even have the slightest idea on whose voices they are. is it his mind playing tricks on him? he has no fucking idea whatsoever, it’s probably just his sleepiness catching up to him. he needs coffee.

when he gets near the lounge, though, the voices are getting a lot clearer. judging how the lights aren’t turned on and how the lounge is dimly lit, banri already figures that it’s the television.

who in their right mind would be in the lounge this late to watch? to the credit of whoever that person is, the volume is turned all the way down, so it’s barely audible by anyone in their rooms. out of curiosity, banri peeks from the corner of the lounge, and does a double take.

“hyodo?” banri blurts out. shit, he did not mean to say his thoughts out loud.

hyodo’s eyes widened in banri’s direction, but before he could react, he doubles over and coughs, choking on his strawberry milk. banri watches hyodo hack a few more coughs before hyodo frowns. “crap, you scared the shit outta me. don’t do that again.”

the stupid look on hyodo’s face is kinda funny.

a good-natured laugh peals from banri’s lips, his sleepiness dissipating from amusement. suddenly banri doesn’t need coffee anymore. banri casually plops on the couch, taking the empty spot next to hyodo. he probably might’ve sat a little closer than intended, but he doesn’t move away. and neither does hyodo.

the television was on a baking channel frequented by omi, sometimes tsuzuru for unknown reasons. of course hyodo would watch something like this. banri doesn’t comment on hyodo’s preferences of channels, eyes fixed on the screen. “unusual for you to be up this late.”

hyodo turns to him, and banri starts to get conscious because he is now feeling hyodo’s breaths down to the nape of his neck. fuck, he should have moved a little bit farther, but it’s too late now and banri also wants to stay in the same position. hyodo probably doesn’t even realize the distance between them, dammit. it takes banri all of his willpower to not stare back at hyodo. “you think so?”

“yeah.” banri replies, ignoring the heat rising to his cheeks. he hopes hyodo does too, if he notices, because he’ll probably prefer to fucking crawl on a hole and die rather than have hyodo point out that he’s getting flustered. more often than necessary, hyodo is a little too perceptive for his own good, and banri wishes this will be one of those times when hyodo becomes as dense as a black hole. banri continues, “you know why i’m still up, i was with itaru-san. now, why are _you_ awake.”

hyodo says nothing, taking a swig from his strawberry milk. banri’s eyes went down to hyodo’s neck, and for some reason his adam’s apple bobbing on his throat makes the pit of banri’s stomach feel funny. banri then looks away, pretending he wasn’t hyperfixated on hyodo’s neck just a few seconds ago. 

banri’s eyes remain glued on the screen, acting as if he doesn’t notice hyodo’s gaze on him. for fuck’s sake, hyodo better stop looking at him that way because he doesn’t have the slightest idea on what to do whenever hyodo does that.

after a few seconds, hyodo answers. “you’re the reason why i’m awake.”

what the absolute fuck.

banri is at a loss for words. don’t tell him hyodo means what he thinks it is. banri could no longer ignore the fact that his entire face is growing flushed, and all he can manage to do is to gape at hyodo and pretend to act dumb on whatever hyodo is trying to say, “the hell did i do to you this time?”

“no, you didn’t do anything.” hyodo shakes his head. his eyebrows furrow deeper to his forehead. “i don’t mean it like that.”

banri hates how he’s starting to short circuit right now, especially when he is only assuming the meaning behind hyodo’s words. what if hyodo doesn’t feel the same way. banri is terrified at the thought of getting the wrong idea, because that would mean that he was only getting ahead of himself.

“what do you mean, then? spit it out.” there is a lot more venom in his voice than he intended. banri kept his eyes downcast, pursing his lips in a silent apology. the question hangs in the air, and hyodo repeatedly opens and closes his mouth, as if he has the answer to banri’s question but unsure if he should say it.

“how do you put this…” hyodo’s eyes are on the cakes at the television, but even banri could tell as much that he isn’t focused on whatever’s happening in the show. hyodo fiddles the straw of the strawberry milk carton, “dunno when it started, but i can’t sleep when i think of you. it gets worse when i imagine holding your hand, or some crap like that.”

shit. how is banri going to fucking deal with this.

banri wishes he can handle this situation better, because if he did then he probably would’ve already admitted that he feels the same way. but curse his pride and embarrassment because he can’t get a single fucking word out of his mouth.

banri isn’t the type to escape, but maybe tonight is an exception. he stands up from the couch and feigns a deep yawn. "i'm tired. good night." 

banri waves noncommitally before he escapes, but not even a single step forward and hyodo grabs banri by the arm.

hyodo’s grip is tight, and so is his hold on the strawberry milk carton with his other hand, its contents spilling out of the straw and dripping down to his fist. banri turns to hyodo, “what’s the deal?”

hyodo glares at banri, eyes a lot less piercing than usual, the tips of his ears burning. “don’t you dare turn tail after you make me say that.”

they lock eyes for a few more moments before banri plops back down to the couch. “fine.” hyodo lets go of his arm, and banri’s hand touches the part where hyodo held him. it’s kinda warm. “since when?”

hyodo chews the straw. “for a while now.”

that doesn’t exactly answer anything, banri thinks to himself. “why me, then?”

“don’t ask me, i’ve no fuckin’ idea either.” hyodo sighs gruffly. “if i were given a choice, i sure as hell wouldn’t pick you.”

that stings. it would hurt a lot more if banri didn’t know how hyodo feels about him. banri is glad he does. hyodo continues, “i just thought one day that maybe you weren’t all that bad, and it went downhill from there.”

banri stays silent, not knowing how to respond. he remembers what hyodo said earlier about wanting to hold hands, so he wordlessly rests his arm on the space between them, palm open, hoping he will get the idea.

without missing a beat, hyodo slips his fingers in between banri’s. they stay silent the whole time, not saying a thing on how their digits perfectly fit in each other’s gaps, or how the minimal contact managed to warm them up completely.

this is the most anticlimactic confession banri has experienced, he thinks as he runs a thumb on hyodo’s knuckles. he wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> the sun is about to rise and i certainly am about to drop ;; thanks for reading


End file.
